De-Flower Power

Also wrote this in March. Was originally called: Flippy Hippie..HA.

Words don't come to me
as fluently
as they use to.

Pungent poison place,
bitter retro-distaste.

Why ask for tolerance?
Trying to seek understanding is hard to do.

I use to be unscathed by this bullshit.
Turn the other cheek, take another hit.

Now I'll go ballistic,
on your chauvinistic.

You're an unoriginal bucket of spinelessness, if the shoe fit.

Everything that's uttered,
motivate to stimulate,
Just spit out to replicate.

So I "sold out" to a clear disposition.
"settling", "belittling", "normalcy",

STRONGER IS YOU?

The seed of your pants is NOT a freelance.
To go untamed IS a ball and chain, because insecurity always remains the same.

So "be free" to self sabotage.
You said to submit is to be powerless.

But in truth: The heart is not, The head is restless.

Cuntformity Poem

Wrote this in March...how suiting:

Such a plain plague,
indifferent to him now.

Imperfect phase,
you don't even cross his mind,
I don't think...

Possessed.
It is a possession to me,
but you and your toxicity,
changed the important to the fickle.

Love, sex, lost...
just a mind fixation?

Abstain to remain
for him to obtain,
bliss in fellatio-n.

Almost with the same decency,
You fuck with manipulation.

Haven't done this in a while.

I think I will start posting again. My other blog is more reviews: http://grapeeater.blogspot.com/
Let's give it a go.

To A.Rose:

Met you in the late October.
Close to the house, but far from home.
Loyal to equal parts of pain.
Needed you,
Momentary gain.

Met you in the late October.
Close to the house, but far from home.
Gave me what you didn't know.
Told you,
I had to go.

Met you in the late October.
Close to the house, but far from home.
Reminded you what you gave up.
Gave you,
I gave you up.

I had to go away from you.
You knew just what you had to do.
I heard the noose.

The End to Summer.

Tumor?

My instincts say something is not quite right. I'm trying to shake off this analysis, but the same feeling comes back again. My heart hurts, and I think I have developed a lump in my throat. That large clot of depair, lodged in the back of my throat. It blocks most of the air escaping from your lungs and it makes your stomach unsettled. You always get it when you're trying to hold back something like tears, or guilt, or fear,or anger.

This lump seems t be premeantly there. Can one delevop a growth, like a tumor, or something physical that shows what's happening on the inside?

I feel an illness.

...

Always.

Endlessly.

Durably.

Immortally.

Infinitely.

Lasting.

In perpetuity.

For Keeps.


Without you, today's emotions would be the scurf of yesturday's.

Summer Skin

New changes ahead. This is getting pretty ridiculous. I'm guilt ridden. I should be else where, but I need to be here for now. I need to be excited. Its just hard with all this confliction between my head and heart. Hopefully it will get better though. Paitence, come find me. Open mind. Moment to moment. Priorities don't need to be set in order. They all co-exist. they all need to be dealt with. Maybe I'm just anxious, maybe I'm just not commited. I can't procrastinate anymore or make excuses. I need to make things happen. Monday monday monday.

Place.

Hillside.
Tall grasses.
Come to me sweet new breeze.
I need you love.
I'm locked out again, you have the....
Come to me tall green trees
I need you now, to compromise me.
I wish we did not blink, because you need to know,
there is nothing but darkness to waste and faulseness to show.
wither weather will come, but may it never make faint.
We're almost to the ocean now, skies thick like paint.
Reflections in water will always glisten, though as night comes mere speckles
We won't wait, but be... skin tarnished with freckles.
Hands age, but never texture will souls.
Enriched in lives, these sights and leaves of golds.
Why was this bridge built to fill time?
There is nothing but endlessness for the sunlight to shine.